Back in June I took a random weekend trip to Orlando to hang out with some family and friends. I've done a bunch of Orlando trip reports in the past, and debated about doing this one since my trip wasn't anything special, and these reports can be time consuming.
But then I stopped and thought to myself, "Self, you've got a responsibility to report about HRRRRRRRRR. Don't let the fanboys down. There is important and pertinent information that must be presented!" When I came to my senses, it was obvious that this report had to be done.
So while this short vacation getaway was mainly about family, I did not fail to hit up a few parks while I was in town. The sad part in this story is that trusty Canon camera did fail prior to my leaving town. I thought I had nursed it back to a basic operational level, but when we reached our first destination it rolled over and died. Thankfully, Gary let me use his. Crisis averted.
In my three and a half days in O-Town I managed to play a round of golf, hit up Old Town, MK/Epcot, and IOA/Uni. If you're keeping score at home, here's some of what you'll see and hear in this report: random Disney stuff, my cute little niece, sturgeon, beer, a crappy cell phone pic (a first in my reports), the best hotel lobby on the planet, horrible parenting, fallacies, and monorails.
AND, as the thread title suggests, there will be an exclusive report on HRRRRRRRRRR and a sneak peek at Halloween Horror Nights '09!!! Stay tuned....you don't wanna miss it!
Let's get started......
The trip started with the passengers giving this Allegiant Airlines plane a rectal exam.
It got irritable bowel syndrome and crapped us out in Old Town.....where this picture was the last one my camera would ever take. :(
Since we arrived fairly early in the day in order to meet up with the gang, the coasters were not running yet. I missed those credits again, but yet, I don't care anymore anyway.
We stepped next door to throw down on the go-carts instead.
Afterward we got back to my brother's place and it was time to teach the youngins how to take peoples' money.
"Calina, we're gonna lay down this garbage hand, but I'm just setting him up for a nasty check-raise later on."
Look at her eyeing those chips. Smart girl....or maybe she just wanted to play with them?
The transitions in this report are fierce. The next morning we took a stroll through my favorite hotel ever, just because.
Any hotel lobby that has a stream in it is okay by me.
Seriously, I could travel the world over, and this would still be tops, hands down.
Happiness is lounging here in December with a cup of [insert favorite beverage here] after a long day in the parks.
They say it's good luck to rub this bear's nose.
"Hi, we're in Epcot now. Yay!"
Okay, calling all Photoshoppers. The stage was set for a monumental photo op. The only problem was that I spent 10 minutes waiting for the golden moment. By the time the next one rolled by, the clouds had covered it. :(
Jesus still loves the monorail though. I'm certain of it.
"The seasons come, and the seasons go,
nature knows everything it has to know.
The earth and man, can be good friends,
let's listen so our harvest time will never end."
"Just make believe, you're a tiny little seed,
a tiny little seed that's reaching up to meet your need.
With the right amount of faith, and the right amount of earth,
you'll grow to see the sunshine on your day of birth."
"Let's listen to the land we all love,
nature's plan will shine above,
listen to the laaaaaaaand, listen to the land."
I haven't eaten here in ages. It is now on the list for my next visit.
Hitler had just told us what he thinks of Eric Idle now.
Photoshoppers, all this picture needs is a red (or was it yellow?) grenade in my hand. Overman would be proud!
This Beverly chugging contest was not photographed very well. Also, Beverly chugging contest is an oxymoron. Whenever Beverly is involved, there is clearly NO winner.
"Listen, you little turd. I don't care how cute you are, you're NOT getting my old school Epcot Center visor!" ;)
"Hey Scott, guess where we're going next."
You have to start 'em young.
Wait for it.
Wait for it.....
We're on the monorail, and we're happy.
I never get tired of this entrance.
The band decided to welcome us today.
Maple Leaf Rag!!! Woohoo!!
BTMR time. Hey, even the wild west gets slick every now and then, right?
It was hot out. I didn't mind dancing with the devil on this day....otherwise known as the water canons of death.
I LOVE this station.
So did we survive?
Karen (my brother's best friend's sister) and I caught some of it, but basically this is me trying hard not to laugh at my brother in the front of the log, who was forced to buy a new shirt rather than walk around looking like he just went for a swim.
This is tradition. Hi, mom. Love ya!
We missed Barack by a few days. Oh well. I'm pretty sure he's not going anywhere anytime soon.
I got smoked by Gary. They changed the big targets without telling me. Bastards.
"Look, sweetie. That's the best ride at WDW. Can you say monorail?"
This is cool.
These are not.
Up next, a very special look at IOA/Universal, and HHN preview pics!
Displaying "Online Enthusiast Morality" since 2006, with 99.9% more sarcasm.
Man! This just reminds me how bummed I am that my Disney pass blacks out over the summer, I really love those parks! I have high expectations of your upcoming HRRRRRRRR preview, I'm sure it will be very informative.
The next day turned out to be quite a treat. The plan was to do IOA in the morning, and Uni in the afternoon/evening. Usually, Shannon and I subscribe to the Dan handbook on water rides. However, since there were a couple small kids with us who like 'em, and the fact that it was about 217 degrees with the heat index, I budged.
So en route to the parks we stopped in hell, er, Walmart, and grabbed $1 ponchos for everyone. I also brought sandals that could easily be packed in the baby stroller and changed into when it was time. Preparation is the key to and successful day at the park. This has been a public service announcement brought to you by Captain Preparedness!! Hooray.
Moving right along, it's always a blessing to have the hookup for free tickets. What wasn't expected was having *THE* hookup, and rollin' VIP style the whole day! The names of those responsible are protected in this case. I could tell you who gave us this perk, but jobs, lives, and possibly the security of our whole planet is on the line, so I'll refrain. It was Marmaduke.
As promised, having access like this granted me the ability to do things no mere mortals could ever hope to. And since the world seems to turn with every minute detail involving HRRRRRRR, I will do my best to report what I know, and what I have learned.
There will also be a small preview of HHN '09. Stay tuned, and enjoy.
Jimmy flew this very plane over me once in West Palm Beach. I wasn't inebriated at that point, so I still remember it.
They hide top secret HRRRRRR files in here. Seriously.
Three of these people currently live in Hawaii. I'm jealous of them. These rides make me sick, so I took the opportunity to do something else with my wait time.
This is pathetic.
Pathetic from a different angle. If you like this thing, seek help.
That spinning ride thingy accomplishes one thing....it gives you a look at Hulk's backside. Well, the coaster anyway.
I've been told this part of the ride sucks.
Millennium Force has the airtime equal to four El Toros, three Diamondbacks, Two Voyages, and one Bid Bad Wolf. Discuss.
Cedar Point is the greatest park in the history of mankind and beyond. That has nothing to do with this picture. I hate Cedar Point, even though I like it.
We made it to Toon Lagoon and it started to rain.
So I took another picture.
Hi, Lou! (does Lou still read this stuff?)
Then it was time for logs with lapbars....
...and cheap ponchos! Ponchos make you feel like a walking condom.
Where it's at....I got one turntable and a VIP pass. Where it's at (synthesizer voice) got one turntable and a VIP pass.
Bear with me. There's an important quota to be filled here.
I really like this rapids ride. Many people do.
But one special guest is wetting himself at this point. I'm sure of it.
It looks safe enough to me. OPEN IT NOOOOOOWWWWWWW!!!!!!
No need to TAKE THE TUNNEL anymore.
I love this shirt.
This effect works better when it doesn't seem weird that dude is wearing a winter jacket in the dead off Florida summer. Just sayin'.
"Hey kids, daddy and I are gonna go use our crack pipes in the restroom for a while. Go ahead and climb on whatever you want while we're gone. It'll be okay."
Finally, before we left for Universal, we took a spin on Hulk. We flashed our credentials Wayne and Garth style, were lead into a secret debriefing room, thrown in an elevator, traveled through the core of the earth, the doors opened, I snapped a bad shot with my phone, and we walked into the front row.
Most of that is true.
The last part will be up shortly. I need another drink first.
Displaying "Online Enthusiast Morality" since 2006, with 99.9% more sarcasm.
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