Chapter 5: Playgrounds and Coasters and Beer, Oh My! Toverland
NOTE FROM CHUCK’S INTERNAL EDITOR: As you may recall from our last episode, Chuck rambled on and on about how eccentric and awesome Bobbejaanland was. Yes, he just wouldn’t shut up about it. No matter how much people begged him. So, he’s promised not to ramble as much about Toverland.
Even though Toverland threw one of the single coolest parties ever, Chuck’s not going to ramble on about it.
Even though it’s another eccentric park, with indoor and outdoor sections crammed full of Greek myth and space aliens and elves and trolls and magic mushrooms and croquettes and beer and implements of death and destruction, he’s not going to ramble on about it.
Even though TPR had two-and-a-half hours of awesome ERT and food and beer, he’s not going to ramble on about it.
Why, he’s not even going to talk about the coasters and how he ranks them, which would’ve looked something like this (were Chuck to do it):
TROY!—He would’ve told how this was his second-favorite woodie of the trip thanks to it’s great mix of awesome laterals, ejector air, insane speed, and Trojan Horse themeing.
Booster Bike—He would’ve told how he liked the ride, but didn’t find it any better than Flamingoland’s version. Then he would’ve asked what was up with the alien-plant themeing.
Boomerang—He would’ve thanked God that this was not an actual Vekoma Boomerang, but an extra-large, indoor Rollerskater with a train theme. He liked it fine.
But he’s not going to say any of that. He’s going to show some rare restraint and just right into the pictures, such as they are.
That is all. Thank you for understanding.
Oh, he is allowed to say this: Thank you Robb, Elissa, and Toverland for the single best night of the entire TPR Europe Tour!
Just cross the Three Stooges with Wonderland and Star Wars, then mix in a little Greek myth, and you have Toverland.
They gave us lanyards for the ERT session instead of the usual wristbands. Hmm--in retrospect, this may have been a mistake. Or maybe they wanted TPR on a leash.
"Oh my God! Please tell me this isn't an actual 'Boomerang'!"
Relax, Jeff--it's just a big Rollerskater.
And everyone breathed a sigh of relief.
"Memo to Toverland Marketing Dept.: Following reports of three accidental hangings, numerous incidents of whipping or flogging, and this apparent accidental nose piercing, we think it is time to rethink the 'lanyard' concept."
Toverland really crams a lot of stuff into this building.
Is this the ride that launched a thousand ships?
"Hi there. I'm the Trojan Horse! I'm a great gift! Well, unless you're a Trojan, and I'm full of Greeks ready to sack and burn your city."
You know, if Agamemmon and Priam had had a great ride like this, they would've been having too much fun to fight.
OK, let's hear it: TROY!
Would Paris have passed up a steamy, passionate night of Helen ERT for Troy ERT?
The answer is buried in the sands of time.
Let's not forget the Booster Bike, now--if we can get past the man-eating space plant.
NOTE FROM CHUCK'S INTERNAL EDITOR: More pictures from Toverland. That is all.
"Yoda, I am. Spit on you, I will. Reverse on my flume, you do."
I haven't seen a space-alien-themed flume since Space World.
At this point, the bar wasn't even open.
Nope. Not one beer had been drunk.
You actually get airtime on this water slide. Here we see Melanie sticking her landing.
Rich, however, crashed his raft into the wall and burst into flames--a true RCT moment.
Chair swings. Purty.
Here's a weird little attraction. You're given a wand, which you point at targets to trigger little effects, like pictures spinning around and such. It reminded me of the "Alice in Wonderland" walkthrough at Parque Espana.
Through the Magic Shroom tunnel . . .
. . . to the appointed place of food, . . .
. . . beer, . . .
. . . fire, . . .
. . . and ERT!
What? We gotta ride Troy some more? Well if we gotta, . . .
. . . we gotta!
I had to lie on my back to get this picture of Melanie.
But then this happened. Well, it isn't ERT until someone gets crushed by a wooden horse on wheels, right?
NOTE FROM CHUCK'S INTERNAL EDITOR: This is the last set of Toverland photos. Then you can get on with your lives.
Hmm--looks like a few folks have drunk enough courage.
I think I see Philly Girl somewhere in all that water.
Don't forget--we got Booster Bike, too.
Did I mention there was beer? Oh, I did?
Yeah, I had a few by the time I rode the Bobkarts (which were lots of fun, I might add).
And I'm thinking these members of Team Larry have had a few, too.
Yes, there were quite a few hijinks.
Not to mention opportunities for bodily harm.
"Oh, God, just make it stop!"
TROY! (Well, we hadn't seen it for a few minutes.)
Uh oh! Looks like the conflict that started at Bobbejaanland continued at Toverland, wrestling fans! Melanie deftly blocked Kristie's spinning round kick. Can the dreaded over-the-shoulder legbreaker be far behind?
"Lookit me, Mom! I'm a satellite dish!"
Yes, the mayhem continued all the way back to the bus.
Wow, those are some fun memories to relive! Kristie and I about killed each other (and drenched each other) every chance we got! And yes, I do remember the evening - it was probably my favorite day of the trip. Though I'm pretty sure you could take our group just about anywhere and we'd find a way to have fun! Nice job, Chuck! You're motivating me to finally work on some of my photos.
Chuck - looks like you got a picture of Kristie right after she leg whipped TPDave (you can see him writhing in pain) and right before she fell off the spinning thing and conked her head on the ground.
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