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Photo TR: Chuck's (cfc's) Guilty Pleasures of the UK Tour


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So, let's come clean here--what are your sick, twisted pleasures? Things that tickle you, yet are hated by others? What are your "guilty pleasures"?

 

Ah, yes--the movies of Edward D. Wood, Jr., the music of the Tubes, tater tots . . . I love 'em all, low brow or reviled as they are. So, allow me to take a little of your time by sharing my Top 5 Guilty Pleasures of TPR's UK Tour.

 

5. The Chicken Curry Jacket of Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach: Sure it looked like a potato that had been puked on by a giant condor, perhaps in preparation for feeding it to her hatchlings. But it was good, damn it!

 

4. The Rattlesnake at Chessington: Yes, this was one brutal, punishing steel wild mouse. It slammed you about on its hairpin turns, gave you cheap shots to the gut on its brake runs, and should've provided referrals to local chiropractors at the exit. But its very un-PC "Mexican" themeing was a riot, and it holds a special place in my heart as credit no. 50 (no. 100 was Thunder at Tusenfyrd, BTW).

 

3. X:\No Way Out at Thorpe: Yes, I know--it makes no sense at all, with its backwards course and stopping and starting and shimmying and shaking. Yet, I couldn't help but like the friggin' thing. The utter futility of the ride was just so oddly endearing and appealing, like a lost dog nobody wants. X achieves a level of stupidity that makes it a winner--the Plan 9 of coasters.

 

2. The Coney Beach Experience: Where else can you find the country charm of the midway of the Stanislaus County Fair in Turlock, Calif., along with the seaside ambience of the departed Long Beach Pike? All the rides at Coney Beach looked like they had done their time on the fun-fair circuit and had settled there to retire. The nice elderly couple who ran the "Faggots and Peas" stand sealed the deal here for me:

 

"So, ye want any mushy peas with your fish and chips?"

"Er, no thank you."

"Ah, afraid it'll give ye the wind, eh?"

 

The lack of certification for the rides was just icing on the cake. Coney Beach, I salute you.

 

1. The Pirate Adventure at Drayton Manor: This was actually a bright spot for me at Drayton, believe it or not (along with Apocalypse and The Haunting). Yes, it's a cheesy ripoff that lifts shamelessly from Disney's Pirates of the Caribbean; hell, it even stole the lame midride drop from the Florida version as well as the "Pepper's Ghost" effect from the Haunted Mansion. Yet, I wager that when this ride was new, it was pretty cool, and with a little TLC, could be cool again (as long as they remember to keep the exit doors shut).

 

Pics are next. Now, if you'll excuse me, some station somewhere must be showing Attack of the 50-Foot Woman (the original version with Allison Hayes, of course).

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"Aye, a blatant plunderin' of Disney," sez you! "Arghh, but we uses a goat 'stead of a dog," sez I!

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Arghh! Hard about! Put our rudder to that disturbin' she male!

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Aye, here be one spirited wench, at least.

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Avast! Belay that booty call, ye brazen wench! Least ways till ye fixes yer face.

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Aye, there be booty fer all, sez I!

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Ahoy! Allow me to take ye on a quick tour of the Spanish Main, before me mate here has another coniption, like!

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. . . even if you're on the DEATH RIDE!

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Remember--it's safety first at Coney Beach . . .

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I wonder if Coney is paying Christopher Lee any royalties for using his face?

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Who will ever forget the "Happy Gator Incident" at Coney Beach? Certainly not these unfortunate souls.

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I bonded with X.

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I wonder if Jim Morrison had this in mind when he sang "ride the snake" in "The End"? (Most likely not.)

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Mmm--just look at the chicken-curry goodness, splattered all over those carbohydrates. I wonder if they deep fry these in the States?

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^That's why they're called "guilty pleasures," dude; usually, you can't explain the appeal to others. Oh, well--I understand that this is the last season for X, anyway.

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^I thought about including The Ultimate. When I rode it in the front train, it beat the living hell out of me. I bashed my right elbow on the first drop and my arm went numb (except for some tingling in my fingers). You can see me cradling my arm behind Robb in one of the update photos.

 

After I got my feeling back, I rode it toward the back, which was actually OK (or maybe I just knew what to expect).

 

You'll be pleased to know that this was Nigel's favorite ride.

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Chuck, my guilty pleasures of the UK trip would include: The Treetops Coaster and Bounce at Oakwood, The Pirates Adventure at Drayton Manor, the Virgina Reel at Joyland and the Snail's dark ride at Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach. And of course any of the many fantastic, spine tingling ghost trains on the trip! I thought these were all fun!

 

--Eric J

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Chuck, I love that you're starting different types of TRs... Nothing wrong with the regular photo reports, but it's cool to have something different.

 

I too loved Coney Beach, you simply have to have appreciation for the fact that it's even stayed open as long as it has. My complete love of anything Lego-related I guess should also be a guilty pleasure!

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^Thanks, Lou and Robb. Plenty of folks (such as Eric and Derek) are doing a good job with the overall experience, so I thought I'd zero in on the details.

 

That borderline pornographic bunny ride at Oakwood is in the top ten of my guilty pleasures, too.

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This is awesome!

 

My "guilty pleasures" from the UK trip:

 

The Ultimate: Ok, the first half was a bit boring. But the second half was super fun!

Air: I've heard countless times how boring and forceless it is. But I thought it was fun and different, cause I'd never been on a flying coaster before.

Space Invader II: I thought it was fun. Cheesy, but fun.

Tyrolean Tubtwist: I really liked this ride. We rode it twice.

Teeny Weeny: No explanation necessary.

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In reference to the Chicken Curry pic....I wonder if Crackel Barrel does that?..lol

 

I enjoy Curry chicken, but not how the locals make in Hawaii. Damn they "pour" on that curry powder and I think I could get another 3-4 mpg out of my Lexus after eating that!

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