We generally have a plan for each day when we vacation, with some room built in for rearranging and/or spontaneity. The plan for Day 3 was Capilano Suspension Bridge Park and then board games. But since we were ahead on Day 2, we had already done the board game stuff, and when we ran ahead on this day, we brought forward some Day 5 stuff to here.
If you're wondering why I've told you all that, I understand. Let's just assume that it might be relevant later....
Erik & Smisty's Vancouver Oddventure Day 3: Safety Nature
Capilano is in North Vancouver, but wisely runs free shuttles from the downtown area up to themselves. Here we are aboard one such shuttle bus, crossing Lion's Gate Bridge. (More on that in Day 4.)
Oof. That doesn't look good. But not to worry! First of all, this is the line to buy tickets, and we'd bought ours ahead of time. And second, this photo was actually taken on our way out, but I've placed it here for narrative purposes. (You've got to watch me; I'm tricky.)
Totemy things, is the technical name for these, I believe.
Here you can see the rest of our party: Damien, Becka, Backpack Man, Hat Boy, Hat Boy's Mom, and Angry Steve.
These people are not with us.
It might be worth mentioning that I love bridges--especially ones that move. Smisty...not so much.
(Please use handrails.)
Yub nub, eee chop yub nub.
So...they built a crooked wooden house, but first they poured level concrete? These settlers have some very inconsistent construction skills.
"What have I done with my life?"
"Dude, I can go."
This is probably what Playland looked like before they paved it.
Not that I'm bitter.
Cliff House Restaurant
I ordered the ravioli, with salmon. They forgot the salmon. I wouldn't normally make a fuss, but we were literally the first and only customers at this point.
Capilano has a photo of me where I look fatter, on permanent display.
These girls are not laughing at me.
I don't think.
We mostly kept ahead, but it did get a bit crowded. (It was Saturday, after all.)
All told, we walked over 11 miles on this day. So here's a photo of the real heroes, our feet. (Well, one of my feet and those of a total stranger, but still.)
Tourists can obtain more than 85% of their information from plaques.
Nature thing. Quiet, it might hear you.
The waterfall, I mean. It doesn't make sense. I'm trying to be funny. Sorry.
While I appreciate the warning, a bit more specificity would be welcome. What exactly is the danger? Snakes? Rusty nails? Socialists? How can I be expected to make good decisions based on incomplete information?
I don't know this person. But she wouldn't move, so now she's with us forever, in photographic spirit.
This is an erosion display. But all it takes it for one person to reach out and touch it and soon all these idiots are washing their hands off in it. Like, you weren't even touching anything and this isn't the end of your not touching anything and it's clearly marked as an erosion display, what is wrong with you? God, I hate people.
This photo is objectively terrible, but I love it, so here you go. "Man Explodes into Gift Shop."
This "band" is named The Capilanos. I am not kidding.
After a brief stop back at the hotel, we took a journey via Vancouver's hilariously named public transportation system, the Skytrain. We rode this all over town, and while it's a lovely amenity, there was not one second of it that was not underground.
And where were we going, you ask? Well, thanks for asking! Queen Elizabeth Park.
Misty is very proud of this photo, and rightfully so.
I guess it's okay for people to be in this fountain...? I don't know how Canada works.
Anyway, that dome is our next stop, the Bloedel Conservatory.
Uncle Fester is no longer here. Stop asking.
It's one frigging plant. Look, we have loads more. And statues. And birds.
Seriously, we're more than just a home for Uncle Fester. Look at this thing. This is nice.
There's a big dome. It's pretty.
It's gone, and it's never coming back, okay. Check out these animals, instead.
This Uncle Fester joke is getting tough to maintain, but the payoff is almost here.
Wait for it....
(Bam. Nailed it!)
Queen Elizabeth Park, as you can see, is very nice--even if the Conservatory is a pale imitation of itself without Uncle Fester.
Smisty is good with bridges that don't move.
I think this was a lynching. Canadian justice can be harsh.
This sculpture ("Love in the Rain") was designed for people to attach padlocks to. (I'm guessing so that they would leave Vancouver's bridges alone?)
Goodbye, Queen Elizabeth Park! We'd love to stay, but we have more trees and flowers to look at!
Just a couple of blocks away from the Bloedel Conservatory (still my favorite Bond film) is VanDusen Botanical Garden.
Are you sick of looking at trees, yet? Well, Vancouver says too bad!
I hope you enjoy this brief moment of being inside.
We wanted to sit for a minute, but these selfish jerks hogged up this bench the whole time we were there!
Okay, that joke was dumb. They can't all be hilarious. You need to breathe on occasion. I'm just looking out for you.
This is a fancier restaurant than the cafe back in the entrance building, but there was a wedding going on in it, just like everywhere else. Seriously, we saw at least three weddings at VanDusen, and two or three more back at Queen Elizabeth Park. Canadians need to calm the hell down with all their wedlock, man.
This place is big. If we had realized just how big, we might not have tackled it on this day. We saw a good chunk, and what we saw, we really liked, but we weren't quite able to cover all of it. Ah well, another reason to venture back to Vancouver one day, I suppose.
Istanbul, Not Constantinople
Wait, that's not right....
I am so sick of looking at trees and flowers. I just need a few meters of concrete and like an A&W or something. Please.
If I'm being completely honest, this is why we're here at VanDusen. A proper hedge maze!
And it wasn't easy, either. Good stuff!
Unless they get Uncle Fester back, you can probably skip the Blofeld Conspiracy, but VanDusen is definitely worth a visit.
Christmas card? Yearbook photo? Album cover? Fear of fire ants? Something weird is going on here.
I'd show you the Canadian one, but it wasn't as good.
U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!
No, I'm just kidding. We suck. I mean, look at this Canadian gift shop! It's brilliant!
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