Next up is a park I'd nearly forgotten about: Pleasurewood Hills. As I recall from looking through my old photos, we didn't spend that much time there. This was a rather "RCT-like" park, as it was just random rides plopped down on a big grassy field hemmed in by trees. I'm surprised there weren't any grid marks on the ground (maybe the cosmic RCT player had that switch toggled "off").
Still, Pleasurewood did have two fairly interesting attractions. One was an old Schwarzkopf coaster with an identity crisis. This ride, which is a "Jumbo V" model according to rcdb.com (if that means anything to you), was dubbed "Enigma," yet there was a sign at the entrance reading "Cannonball Express' (I presume this was its previous name). The trains looked like, well, two-car trains with question marks painted on the engine. I guess this is the UK's version of "Avalance/Hell Cat" in the Wisconsin Dells. But, like many old Schwarzkopfs, it was an enjoyable coaster.
The park's other standout attraction was Tales of the Coast, a dark ride based on local history and legend. You ride in boats on a winding river where you encounter a witch and a rather grumpy "hell hound"--all in 3D! Cheesy, but fun.
I also vaguely remember a large kiddie coaster themed to a snake. Unfortunately, I have no photos of it. Perhaps it never existed.
We don't have much time here. Best head on in.
Hmm . . . "Pleasurewood" sounds like some British euphemism for male masturbation.
"Holy nomenclature, Batman! I thought this ride was called 'Enigma'!"
"That's right, Robin! The 'Cannonball Express' sign is obviously some sort of joke."
"Wait--a joke and an enigma? What could it mean, Batman?"
"Think, Robin! What's another word for 'enigma'"?
"Hmm--conundrum, mystery . . . or riddle!"
"Exactly! The Joker and the Riddler have joined forces! No time to lose!"
I did ride this thing. I did not lose my breakfast, and I remember it being kind of fun.
See what I mean about this park being "RCT-like"?
OK, OK . . . no need to be bossy about it.
Shark Tums . . . n-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!
"Welcome to Tales of the Coast, me hearties! Now, I'd love to be tellin' ye some tales, but first I needs help findin' me contact lens."
"Well, I could tell you about my trip to WalMart the other day. Now there's a hair-raising tale, especially when you factor in the fellow who was wearing purple leggings and leopard-skin tights so form fitting that you could see his whole . . . wait! Come back! I'm not finished!"
"Grr. Woof. Woof. Grr, I tell you."
I guess these cars served England with pride in the last few wars.
Perhaps England fought a war with King Triton or the Lost Continent of Atlantis.
Ugh! This car has a bad case of crabs.
"We're taking the sky ride to avoid coming in contact with crabs."
Look! It's a retired Canadian postman and a woman from Manchester! Now there's a sight you don't see every day. That's all for now.
Great stuff Chuck! That was the demon slide that gave me massive wood burn on my arms and legs! This was the day where we went to 3 parks, Pleasure"woody" Hills, Joyland and Great "Yourmouth" Pleasure Beach. I think we left Pleasure"woody" Hills before lunch. It was a decent place and I remember that almost every ride had 2 names for it. It had an identity crisis.
Jimmy "No Snake in the Grass Pictures Chuck!!!" Bo
Do not believe this post!
90% of the time, I am sarcastic all the time...it's science!
Next up was the UK's version of the Jersey Shore: Great Yarmouth. We hit two traditional seaside parks within walking distance of each other. Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach was the home of the cleverly named Roller Coaster, and it was my first ride on one of those oldtime "Scenic Railways" that required a brakeman to keep the train from hurtling off the track and into the sea, where, no doubt, hungry sharks schooled, awaiting their supper . . .
OK, that was a bit too dramatic. Anyway, Roller Coaster was a fun experience, even if it won't be setting any speed records.
Pleasure Beach also featured Snails and Fairy Tales, a very "ghetto" version of a Disney dark ride. Part of the ride was outdoors and consisted of mostly painted cut-out scenery, while the indoor portion was a bit more elaborate (if that's the correct term to use). The park's Haunted Hotel ghost train was old school and fun, though, and I thought the crazy cycle on their Scrambler (called "Twister") would never end. There was a "3D" fun house, too.
The neighboring park, which you could reach by walking or riding in a horse-drawn carriage, was called Joyland. There were a few unusual old rides here, such as the Tyrolean Tubtwist, a "Virginia Reel" type of ride, which led to the inevitable "is it or is it not a credit" debate. (Answer: It's powered, so "no." It also made me feel a little ill from the spinning). The Snails ride also sparked some controversy, but, no, it's more an outdoor "dark ride." But the park did have one legitimate kiddie credit: Spook Express. It was, indeed, an adventure in exquisite horror, and was probably a bit scarier than the park's ghost train (which also ingeniously named "Ghost Train").
"Please note that we are not standing whilst the car is in motion. Thank you."
"Dur . . . can I pet the snails, George?"
Life ain't easy for a snail named "Plod."
"Yay! I'm not riding stupid Plod!"
You know, the whole story "Jack in the Beanstalk" is sort of like "Breaking Bad." Jack starts out as a normal kid, gains a sense of power through some magic beans, sneaks into the Giant's castle, steals some stuff, then murders the poor bastard. I'll bet this little creep now provides all the meth in Fairyland.
"Under the sea . . . just pretend you're under the sea . . ."
King Triton would like you to buy this watch.
OK, I know this looks like someone puked all over a potato. But the curry-chicken sauce was quite tasty, and the spud was cooked perfectly.
The Scooby Gang is about to check into the Haunted Hotel--but will they check out?
"I think I'm missing my spleen. Can you see it anywhere?"
"Pull my finger!"
"Uh uh. I know where that finger's been, and it ain't pretty."
OK, kids--how many of you know what this is?
Why walk to Joyland when you can ride in style?
Not a credit. Sorry.
"Where? Where can I find the entrance to Spook Express! I shall go mad if I don't find it!"
"Up here, chowderhead."
The horror . . . the horror . . .
Yeah, the theming of this coaster is a bit screwed up.
"I do not like this snail ride. I must be riding Plod."
"Yay! Bestest ride ever!"
"OK, second bestest ride ever!"
And then Dracula sucked out my brains, which certainly explains a lot. That's all for now.
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