Wes Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Thursday morning, I was at work in beautiful downtown Glendale, when my bosses came in with an emergency. They needed someone to fly to Orlando to assist on a project that was of the utmost importance. The work wasn't difficult, but there was no one to do it. I volunteered, and thus got a completely free trip to Orlando for the weekend. What ensues is the craziness that happened over the 40 hours I was in O-Town, and how I conquered it and became it's master. Hey Scott. Hey Matt. I waited for like 5 minutes to get this picture for both of you. You better save it, print it out, and frame it. OMG, open gate photo!!! OMG!!!! YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG Seriously, the hand is still there. PROOF. I guess they haven't taken down the giant hand yet. oh well. [insert Paul comment here] [insert Lou comment here] YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG After my work had finished, I decided to head over to Epcooter. Hmmm...something's different here. By the way, I rode the slide like 8 times because we had a break. Big fudging loser, I know. And your ass gets dumped out here. So necessary. Then you twist through this rock structure, complete with two waterfalls. It starts here. You go down the mast. Ok, this is the BEST HOTEL WATERSLIDE EVER!!! My hoopty for the weekend. Holler bitches. So, this is what I had to get sent out to work on. I won't go into details, other than to say it was beyond simple. F**K This! [insert Derek comment] If these were actually alcoholic, I'd be in AA. Mmmmm.... Bitch Drink Count: 1 Hour Two: Get some (free) grub. How about Spoodles? "Hi, I'm Good Tower. My ride story makes sense, my boiler room doesn't look like a cartoon, and I don't have a random hallway separating the elevator doors from the elevator." Here's my view. GOOD Tower, Rock N' Roller Coaster, and Boardwalk's Coaster Pool (Not a credit you losers...you know who you are.) Oh, I got a villa. With a kitchenette. Jealous yet? Do you see the complimentary bottle of Palmolive and FREE SPONGE?!!?! Let's start at hour 1: Arriving at my hotel...Disney's Boardwalk!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wes Posted December 9, 2007 Author Share Posted December 9, 2007 EPCOT Part Dos Nevermind, this is still WAY MORE TERRIFYING THAN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD. As Day One winds to a close, I leave you with the most frightening image imaginable. When this hits B, and the doors open, you walk into the elevator. Unlike other versions, where the doors open, you walk through a hallway, and then get onto the elevator. Just saying. I got some time to kill, why not head over to MGM for an hour or so? From now on, any time I see anything related to Dreamfinder I'm just going to automatically think of South Park. Imagine....a time when Imagination was a GOOD ride. "I'm going to eat your skin." My thoughts on Imagination put into physical form. YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG Imaginaaaaaaaaation, ImaginAAaaAAAaation, ImaginaaaaAAAAAAAaaaation This would NOT work well with Vault or Margaritas. "Wes, we have so much in common. We both hate giraffes, we both play bass in mediocre bands, I even love drinking Vaultaritas!" Always opt for the more intense version of Mission: Sinise. "Wes...I miss you...I miss your lips." You didn't think I could go to EPCOT without showing this, could you? Beemerboy Porn. And the end is somewhere in that mass of terrible humanity. Who the heck cares? Everyone knows the plot. SPOILER ALERT: JESUS IS BORN. The end. Here's the middle. Ok, here's the first in a three part series. This is the end of the line to see the "Candlelight Processional". LOL Damn, they sure took down that hand fast!!!!! YOU ALSO ARE DOING IT WRONG YOU'RE DOING IT REALLY REALLY WRONG THE VAULTARITA COMETH ...I tried drinking them at the same time?! Both of them taste so good by themselves, but what if... Well I have a Vault, and I have a Fiesta Margarita..hmmm.... Sadly not Vault Icee's, which are apparently better than sex if you're a pathetic virgin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wes Posted December 9, 2007 Author Share Posted December 9, 2007 Ok, so I decided to spend my last 6 hours or so in Orlando at Islands Of Adventure. Normally I take stupid pictures and make lame jokes, but I decided to try something different. Now I would shoot video with my Sony Digicam in Movie Mode and make lame jokes ON CAMERA. I shot all this today, edited it in the terminal at MCO with iMovie, and now it's uploaded here for you to see. Wesruinsioa2.wmv Could these two men be possibly doing it incorrectly? Erik is really excited to ride the wheelchair seat on FU!! Still the ride with the best acronym ever: FU. I'M DOING IT WRONG Rich, this shirt still sucks! Doesn't the boy Who look like that dude from High School Musical? I was trying to take a picture of the Doctor Doom Face doors and the damn things slid open just as I was taking it, so now you have to settle on an unintentionally creepy shot of some girl in Daisy Dukes. I know most of TPR would prefer to see Doctor Doom doors versus a girl, so sorry guys. YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG STEVE HOLT! If you think this slogan rings true, you're probably an alcoholic. A select few people probably get this joke. Menace 2 Society Sadly I got to Universal very early, so I couldn't go pay my tribute to the Lt. Dan photo. 6/11/1993 NEVER FORGET! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meteornotes Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 I am in awe. There is so much amazement here, that most humans cannot begin to comprehend it all. Wes is a god among men. Read this PTR or regret it forever! dt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Schmoofy Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Thursday, so I imagine you DID manage to get onto Spaceship Earth for a preview? >:[ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cfc Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 I stayed at the Boardwalk a few years back, but the damn ship's mast slide was out of commission. Burn in hell, Figment! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spaceace12 Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Nice rental car, allot better than my Malibu. What do you do for a leaving, Wes, that you get these awesome free trips? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dandaman Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Imaginaaaaaaaaation, ImaginAAaaAAAaation, ImaginaaaaAAAAAAAaaaation Everyone knows the plot. SPOILER ALERT: JESUS IS BORN. The end. So... so brilliant... it's like a joygasm for the eyes! Dan "No, not that joygasm... YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG" Smith Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheRapidsNerd Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Oh...my sides! Damn that was funny! "YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG!" is destined to be a classic. Sadly not Vault Icee's, which are apparently better than sex if you're a pathetic virgin. Ouch! Imagine the reaction to the Vaultarita... So, when do we see the mast slide and coaster slide PoVs? (yes I am that sad, but somebody had to ask...) Awesome PTR! Enjoyed it much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dandaman Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 ^It's everywhere over the Internet already, but Wes always seems to improve on any caption in the history of mankind ever. Dan "Wes: Making pre-existing things their most kick-assiest since before you were born" Smith Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Director_Guy Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Eric Idle should not be allowed to: 1. "Moon" people at a Disney park. 2. Use his imagination. 3. Sing*. *Monty Python songs excluded Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SharkTums Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 We missed you today. Now we don't! Glad you had fun without us! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
65skylark Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Awesome Wes! Can't wait to see the rest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RIP Psyclone Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 I think to make a proper Vaultarita you must bring a bottle of tequila to Target, but still Wes came up with a great idea. How about Vaultaritas at the next TPR party? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wes Posted December 9, 2007 Author Share Posted December 9, 2007 Thursday, so I imagine you DID manage to get onto Spaceship Earth for a preview? >:[ Thursday was the day I found out I had to go, not the day I went. So no SSE preview...no biggie. What do you do for a leaving, Wes, that you get these awesome free trips? For a "leaving" I create magical content for the internet that usually doesn't load correctly. Should be noted this was my first ever fully paid business trip. So, when do we see the mast slide and coaster slide PoVs? (yes I am that sad, but somebody had to ask...) I don't do POV stuff, sars. Anyways, great TR and I'm really curious as to what work you had to do there. Get shocked while drinking water?! Just setting up and running some equipment, including an HD camera. Nothing spectacular, bt I guess I'm the only one in our department who can properly run an HD cam and was available. *shrug* How about Vaultaritas at the next TPR party? In all honesty, the Vaultarita, as awesome as it was to make, was sorta gross after awhile. I was able to drink about half of it. The flavors didn't go well together blended. Stay tuned for the thrilling conclusion to this TR, coming later tonight! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
niiicolaaah Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Oh man, what a great trip report. When do I get to go back to Epcot??????????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Homer Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Not as epic as the quest for Choup, but more Xtreme? Hell yeah. Can't wait for the rest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RIP Psyclone Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 ^I like the red octopus one myself. This time, though, it's funny with Wes actually writing the Gary Sinise pillowtalk himself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DATman Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Best TR I've read since quest for Choup and Red Octopus. Wes has once again proven that he is king. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wes Posted December 9, 2007 Author Share Posted December 9, 2007 I'm at the airport. Just finished up at IOA. Video (yes VIDEO) to come later... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayjay719 Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Great Trip report Wes! I still have to go to Epcot.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robbalvey Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 "I'm going to eat your skin." LMAO! I actually laughed out loud. I think I ever peed a little. --Robb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Homer Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 You never cease to amaze me, Wes. I think I almost passed out from that video. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dandaman Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Wes, you're the only person/entity I can think of that could bring the term "unicorn vomit" to fruition. Freakin' hilarious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Not For Sale Posted December 10, 2007 Share Posted December 10, 2007 I love this trip report. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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