Fri Aug 18, 2017 1:08 am
Yeah, I was really only interested in those two rides. This wasn't the leisurely stop to enjoy those two parks, which I normally will do even with a small park. Today was all about Morey's, so Hydrus and Gale Force were really just a bonus. If I ever get back out that way, I may explore the shore a bit more, but I couldn't keep two drunk assh*les waiting any longer.
Awesome update Andrew. With some super great photos. I completely forgot you said you went back to GreatAdv Saturday morning for that ERT.
Then again, we were sh*tfaced when you caught up to us Saturday afternoon.
I can't wait to see the next part, mainly because it'll be my first time hearing about what happened that afternoon since it's all a bit of a blur for me
Fri Aug 18, 2017 9:32 am
This is an entertaining read so far. I can't wait to read more.
Fri Aug 18, 2017 4:52 pm
Really enjoying following along on your trip! I've never been to Morey's or Ocean City but frequent SFGAdv several times a year. It's fun to hear you got to meet up with Boldikus and coasterbill. Seeing as you're still alive to write this TR, they were either cool and you're safe and sound back home... or they're holding you hostage somewhere while blasting Holiday in the Park music on repeat and forcing a false positive review of your time with them. If it's the latter, use the code phrase "I love Ka in row 9" and we'll come look for you.
Sat Aug 19, 2017 5:15 am
I love Ka in row 9.
It's a metal building. I can hear freeway sounds and seagulls.
Sat Aug 19, 2017 11:09 am
ytterbiumanalyst wrote:I love Ka in row 9.
It's a metal building. I can hear freeway sounds and seagulls.
Do any of these images look like your surroundings?
It'd be much too obvious for those Jokers to stash you in Skull Mountain so I think you're just across the way.
Sat Aug 19, 2017 11:24 am
No, nothing like that. Luckily though, I got a picture of it before a bag was put over my head.
Sat Aug 19, 2017 2:29 pm
Day 3 Continued: Three Guys, Two Girls, and a Pizza Place
I got into Wildwood about 3 and checked into my hotel, the Hojo at the north end of the boardwalk. It’s actually really nice, plus they offer free parking and free breakfast, the former of which will save you a stack of cash, and the latter of which is very much appreciated after a day of drinking and riding.
I met up with everyone at the bar (come on, you didn’t seriously expect them to be anywhere else, did you?) and we then went to get our wristbands. Morey’s is the third most expensive one-day ticket I’ve ever bought, behind Universal and Disney. It’s honestly overpriced for what is there, but it’s also a much better value for the money than any other Jersey Shore boardwalk. I paid it, and so did many other people, so they’re clearly doing it right.
First up was Great Nor’Easter. This is a fantastic ride. I’ve always thought that the Vekoma SLCs had a killer layout, they just also try to kill you. Great Nor’Easter is not only content to let you live, it actually shows you a good time too. I love it, and I love any place willing to put this much effort into making a terrible ride really great. T3, you can still die in a fire.
Next was AtmosFEAR. I did not expect the onboard audio, but it made the ride so much better than it already was, and if you’ve ridden a Larson drop tower, you know it’s already awesome. I’m a sucker for any ride with a storyline, especially a cheesy one, so this was absolutely among the best drop towers I’ve ever been on.
We could not put off the log flume any longer. I got to ride with Bill and Brit (so if you’re following along, I rode both a skyride and a log flume with the world’s biggest fan of these rides, which was a highlight of the trip). The flume is spectacular, and certainly one of the best I’ve ever been on. It’s right up there with Timber Mountain and Splash Mountain in California. Both drops are quite large, which makes it seem like you’re riding two log flumes in a row without getting up, plus the “Under the Boardwalk” scene is pretty great. Yes, they do play the Drifters song if you’re wondering.
We had to do “it” next. We were thinking about “it,” and walked over to “it,” and then we got in line for “it.” We watched “it” until it was our turn to ride “it.” Then we put our stuff in the cubbies next to “it” and got in “its” seats. Could we handle “it”?
Nope, “it” couldn’t handle us. We broke “it”! About halfway through the cycle “it” had to be e-stopped and we were escorted off “it.” We were so devastated, there was only one thing to do: Hit the bar.
We went to Joe’s on Surfside Pier, which was really great. I tried out some of the Cape May Brewing Co. offerings, both of which were very good.
All liquored up and ready to go! Sort of. Boldikus had to run back to his parents’ house to do some dogsitting because he’s lame like that, so Bill, Brit, and I rode the other coasters on this pier. Doowopper was just okay, not a bad ride but nothing special either. Flitzer was pretty fun though, much better than you’d expect just by looking.
That was all we wanted to do on that pier, so we headed south. This was my first experience with WATCH THE TRAM CAR PLEASE WATCH THE TRAM CAR PLEASE WATCH THE TRAM CAR PLEASE WATCH THE TRAM CAR PLEASE WATCH THE TRAM CAR PLEASE WATCH THE TRAM CAR PLEASE WATCH THE TRAM CAR PLEASE. Wow, it must suck to be a tram driver, having to hear that godawful noise hundreds of times per day.
Okay, down on Mariner’s Pier now, and it’s early evening, so the crowds are starting to pick up. We headed straight to Rollie’s Coaster, which is a hilariously mild coaster to have OTSRs. WTF, Moreys? Not a bad ride, just not great.
Next up was Sea Serpent. Yeah, I got roped into this one. Hey, this is the place that made an SLC good, maybe their boomerang doesn’t suck? Nope, it totally sucks snake balls. Only bad coaster here, honestly.
Still no Boldikus, so the three of us decided to ride the monorail swan boats. Oh man, does this ride suck swan balls. Do swans have balls? No idea, but if they do, then this ride would suck ‘em. It’s like trying to ride a bicycle if that bicycle were made out of concrete. It would be a good workout, except that it’s not fun in any way at all.
Finally Boldikus decided to show up again, so it was time for the Ghost Ship! We had ideas of waiting until after dark, but decided just to do it right then. I’m not that big into haunted houses, but it really is one of the best walk-through attractions I’ve ever been in, complete with a pre-show! One of the actors cornered me with a surgical scalpel, and it was legitimately frightening, even though I knew they weren’t really going to harm me.
On to Pirates of Wildwoods, the park’s 3D dark ride. I have no idea what this is about, but I do know that it requires two riders, no more, no fewer. Since we were a group of 5, this posed a logistical problem, as apparently this park hadn’t considered that odd numbered groups might possibly want to ride together. Their solution? Bill would parent swap for me and Brit. Yep, you read that right. So I rode this adventure probably conceived by people on LSD, then Bill just sat there on the car from the exit platform to the loading platform, then Brit got on and rode with him while the other 3 of us waited at the exit. I mean, I love parent swap, and it really helps with kids who aren’t tall enough or are too afraid to ride, but this is definitely the only time I’ve ever experienced a parent swap with a group of adults. Well, we’re sort of adults. We resemble adults sometimes.
Adventure Pier! Loved the atmosphere. They had a very decent cover band, especially considering how young they were. All of them were teenagers, and they had some talent. Great White is a really good coaster, and I was totally sold on it being the best coaster here. I had no idea that it wasn’t running at its full capabilities (ominous foreshadowing).
Next up was the Screamin’ Swing. We got our tkts at the shipping container, then boarded. The swing is really great, as they all are. This was my first ride on the smaller model, the one that’s usually an upcharge, and it definitely has a bit more open feeling. They run a long cycle too.
It was time for some pizza, and we of course went to Mack’s. Quite possibly the best pizza I’ve ever had. We have a pizza place in Springfield owned by a guy from New Jersey, and it tastes a lot like this.
Now back to Surfside for another attempt to ride “it.” I would not go home having only had half a ride on “it.” This time “it” could handle us. Super long cycle, ridiculously awesome, and weird sideways/upside-down airtime—all with lap bars! This is the absolute best ride of this type, and it’s a type I love. Now, for those of you who are about to bring up the Ohio accident, I remind you that I survived the Badlands just two days earlier. I am invincible.
We also had to do Dante’s Dungeon while we were over here. I liked this one a lot better than the other dark ride. Very old school and very well done.
We then went over to ride Zoom Phloom again, only this time, they thought it was a great idea to pair me with a boy about 10 years old. Bill and Brit were in the section behind me…so…yeah. Awkward. Super awkward.
All right, we haven’t done enough walking today, so we headed back to Mariner’s Pier to ride the Wave Swinger, then back to Adventure Pier for one last ride on Great White. Now THIS is what this ride can do! Wow, this thing is just awesome. Best ride at Morey’s by a long shot, and the second best that I had ridden that day.
It was around midnight, the piers were closing, and everyone had had a long, boozy day. I had a great time at the boardwalk hanging out with some enthusiasts who don’t at all act like enthusiasts. We were just there to have fun and ride rides like everybody else. The boardwalk itself is fantastic, but I don’t think I would have had nearly as much fun alone. Morey’s is the sort of place where the people you’re with are more important than the things you’re doing. So a big thanks to Coasterbill and Boldikus for being dumb enough to agree to meet a total stranger they met on the Internet and to trust that I wouldn’t be horrible to hang out with.
Sat Aug 19, 2017 2:54 pm
Great report! Looks like I had a great time.
I was absolutely trashed for Pirates of Wildwood and totally forgot about that parent swap thing until now but yeah, there was nothing more awkward than sitting in that boat for a good 5 minutes riding from the exit to the entrance right alongside a queue line full of incredibly confused people.
My favorite was the kid that asked if I worked there while I was sitting on the boat. Yeah kid, I work here and spend my days power riding this acid trip of a boat ride over and over until they kick me out.
We were all at least 10 drinks in when you showed up so I'm sort of impressed to hear that I held it together so well. I'm a f*cking pro apparently.
On a similar note I think Boldikus deserves a trophy for making it back to the boardwalk. Good times, good times.
Lol in all seriousness it was great hanging out with you. Sorry you missed most of the boozing, I definitely had to cut myself off pretty much as soon as you got there so I didn't die. It was a definitely a great afternoon / night of rides, boardwalk food and hanging out. Glad you enjoyed it!
Sat Aug 19, 2017 3:44 pm
^ Thanks! It really was an awesome time.
Sat Aug 19, 2017 3:58 pm
Great report, Andrew....would love to be able to hang out with all of you guys sometime, do some partying and then of course, go some rides and coasters.
Looking forward to the next adventure!