Way back in the year 2000, I moved from Southern California to Sandusky, Ohio, to work at Cedar Point for the summer, and to be a part of the opening crew for what-was-then by far the tallest and fastest roller coaster ever built, Millennium Force.
They say that the friends you make working at Cedar Point last a lifetime. And, in my case, that certainly seems to be true. That year, I met Seth and Natalie (and they met each other). And this year, I traveled back to Sandusky to be the best man at their wedding. (Two other MF opening crew members were part of the wedding party, as well.)
Of course, since we were in Sandusky anyway, we also went to Cedar Point.
This was Misty and I's first visit to Cedar Point's HalloWeekends event, and let me tell you, watching a bunch of cartoon monsters do the chicken dance is pretty scary.
Ah, but there's more in Sandusky than just Cedar Point!
There's also really good ice cream!
And, yes, even mini-golf. (Unfortunately, Wizard's Journey at "Ghostly Manor" was the only one that was actually open this late in the season.)
It wasn't bad, though. And they had a cool dragon out front. I just wanted more places to be open.
Sandusky also has a pretty nice "historic" downtown area...
...the, um, "Boy with the Boot." (Don't ask.) ...
...and fishing, probably.
Plus, a Merry-Go-Round Museum! (Even if the sign on top does say, "United States Post Office.")
Complete with real working carousel!
And angry circus animals!
That has kind of a nice ring to it, I think.
This lighthouse is rubbish. And not even actually in Sandusky.
But you can see Sandusky from there.
Whew, I'm glad they put a sign on that one slippery one.
Oh, right, we have a wedding to go to!
Groomsman Rich makes some final adjustments to Seth's homemade photo booth, while I annoy him by taking pictures of it.
I also provided the wacky props.
I should have said, "Misty and I provided the wacky props." Sorry, I'm distracted by my fatness.
Luckily, DJ was there to make me feel better.
The traditional, "Are you sure you wouldn't prefer one of these women?" photo.
Or, if you're really freaking out, you can just walk out into the sea.
No, you're good?
Okay, then: Dancing.
Hey, guys, what's your favorite ride at Cedar Point?
Yes, I agree. Millennium Force. Not that any of us are biased or anything.
Although, I must say, I'm also really fond of their SLC.
Only Cedar Point would put a show underneath the outside of an empty theater.
On the question of whether CP's HalloWeekends is adult-scary or kid-cutesy, the answer is that it's both, more or less evenly divided.
With some things being for the little ones...
...and some things so horrific that even adults know better than to brave them.
Alright, let's try some houses.
Honestly, while they weren't quite up to California/Florida standards, they're definitely trying.
Um...or maybe not.
That's almost as bad as the view from our hotel room.
Other scary things at Cedar Point include this guy...
...Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds...
...constantly shifting terrain...
...cookies you can't actually eat...
...undead former-Disney execs...
...rather painful-looking shoes...
...and penis-shaped Peanuts characters laughing hysterically.
We liked this display of rides past.
I didn't see this one, though.
Smisty finally got her WildCat credit.
And she discovered the awesomeness that is Troika.
We all got to check out WindSeeker.
Which, I hate to say, is rather dull. Weirdly, I think it's less scary than a StarFlyer, possibly because it feels so much more secure.
On the other hand, we got to witness Cedar Point employees keep a guest trapped in his restraints until he deleted photos off his camera that he'd taken "illegally." So that was interesting.
Oh well, there's still Millennium!
And the thing that used to be where it is. (That sentence makes sense, I insist.)
He looks like the life of the party.
But we've already got a hat.
There was a special "kid friendly" house, but we weren't allowed to go in it because we didn't have a child with us. There was no one else in the area, so it certainly wasn't a capacity thing. Oh, right, we're at Cedar Point. And there's nothing in this world that Cedar Point likes more than slavish devotion to bizarre rules.
Yeah, I'm a little bitter.
We didn't even try to do the kid's maze. I'm sure they would have spit on us.
Let's check out "Club Blood" instead.
Oh, cool, a dragon!
I can't say that I think much of CP's maintenance department these day, either....
This ride is already Halloween themed.
I really wanted to do this one (as it goes through Thunder Canyon's ride trough), but it was closed due to "weather." Which started a heated argument between me and Seth--with my belief being that the "weather" in question was that it had been too dry for the corn to properly grow, and Seth's position being that it only operated after sundown, with daylight qualifying as a weather condition. Only Cedar Point knows for sure.
To anyone who says that Cedar Point doesn't "get it," I say, look at this thing! It's got a big gear for an eye!
All of the water rides were closed for the season, including Shoot the Rapids. But that's okay; We wouldn't have ridden it anyway.
After all, we got plenty wet that week elsewhere....
Oh, was that a Meijer??
Best. Store. Ever. And here's why....
I guess Sandusky isn't so bad.
It's got some great people...
...and the only museum dedicated to Merry-Go-Rounds in the existence! (Note: Please do not Google "carousel" museum.)
In all seriousness, the Merry-Go-Round Museum is absolutely, 100% Erik & Smisty approved, and we highly recommend that you go there the next time you're in Sandusky for whatever reason.
Sandusky also has Chet and Matt's Pizza. Which is certainly the only place I've ever seen chili cheese fry pizza.
And, of course, there's an amusement park.
It's not the best amusement park, mind you, but it does have lots of really cool old-school pinball machines...
...and the best roller coaster that will ever exist. A ride so good that it makes people fall in love, heals minor injuries, and makes kittens fart rainbows.
Of course, your mileage may vary. But it will always be special to us.
Thanks for reading what I daresay has got to be the weirdest trip report I've ever posted. (And this from the guy who normally posts this kind of crap
You may also want to check out our completely wedding-free Cedar Point Trip Report
from two years ago.
But, even if you don't, I applaud you for getting this far.The EndSee, Rich? I told you I could make an Oddventure out of Seth's wedding.