Coasterbill's Alcohol, Coaster and Culture Trip Reports Land

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Re: Coasterbill's Alcohol, Coaster and Culture Trip Reports

Postby coasterbill » Sat Feb 11, 2017 6:51 am

boldikus wrote:And oh yeah sorry for the blue tinted photos though I will say I feel some type of way apologizing for photos in someone else's TR.


:lol: :lol: :lol: I never have trip reports in mind when taking pictures so I never have enough, I'm glad you had as many as you did (though I do have plenty for the next portion). No need to apologize, everyone just has a semi-awful, semi-awesome song stuck in their head now.

anonymouscactus wrote:Image


:lol: :lmao: :lol: :lmao: :lol:

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Re: Coasterbill's Alcohol, Coaster and Culture Trip Reports

Postby boldikus » Wed Feb 15, 2017 12:20 pm

Even though I was there that cliffhanger got me eagerly awaiting the conclusion to the Wildwood pizza taste test. :lol:

Come on, dick! :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

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Re: Coasterbill's Alcohol, Coaster and Culture Trip Reports

Postby coasterbill » Wed May 17, 2017 10:52 am

Okay, I realized I should probably finish this thing before we hit the one year mark, so here goes…
After leaving Surfside we decided that it was finally time to make our way down to the final pier, Adventure Pier! One thing that became really apparent on jaunt to the jawn (how did I do?) was that Wildwood is f*cking huge. The beach is huge, the boardwalk is huge, if you have a Fitbit like I do this place will make you look like the most physically fit person on earth as long as you don’t enter the countless slices of pizza, buckets of fries and gallons of custard you inhale while you’re racking up those steps.

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We had to play a few games along the way too, these moles are about to get whacked... this takes on a whole new meaning in Jersey.

Speaking of which, on the way to Adventure Pier we decided to indulge in some more pizza, this time from Mack’s! Mack’s is a Wildwood staple and Boldikus had been not so subtly informing us that it was way better than the sh*t Sam’s was pumping out so we were definitely excited to give it a try.

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This blue photo is brought to you by Boldikus' favorite filter. Also, no... there aren't pictures of the pizza. I haven't had an Instagram account long enough to start taking pictures of my food yet. lol

In all seriousness, they’re both really good, but I totally agree that Mack’s comes out ahead. I think my biggest gripe with pizza is when everyone tries (and fails) to copy New York pizza and that’s really what Sam’s was going for. I’d much rather you try to put your own spin on it and Mack’s absolutely does that. I think I detected a hint of Cheddar which won me over because it sort of reminded me of Grotto pizza (it sounds weird, but it works… STFU). Sorry Sam’s but Mack’s comes out ahead… 10 points for Gryffindor.

Anyway, enough about that… we had sh*t to ride.

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Oh you know, just drinkin' with Pikachu (photo by Boldikus)

After our long journey down the boardwalk (heroically dodging tram car after tram car along the way) we finally arrived at Adventure Pier. When we got there we saw Great White sending a bunch of test trains and were informed that it still hadn’t opened for the day so we decided to enjoy some of Adventure Pier’s other attractions.

First up was Screamin’ Swing. These things are always a blast and this one was no different, Boldikus went into the weekend declaring it his favorite flat in Wildwood (though “it” won us all over by the end of the day) and even though it’s no “it”, it’s still a great ride.

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Adventure Pier! Where there are adventures! And a pier!

After Screamin’ Swing we decided to wait around a little more for Great White to open but got distracted by the giant Skyscraper ride. Brit hates these things with a fiery passion but I absolutely love them and once Boldikus informed me that he had never ridden one there was absolutely ZERO chance that we weren’t going to ride it.

One thing I noticed about this one was that it has different restraints from the typical racing harnesses that I was used to from Cedar Point. This didn’t really make much of a difference but I guess it does make you feel a little more confident that you’ll live to see your loved ones again after strapping into this amazing / evil contraption when the restraints are made out of steel and not a thing that looks like a recycled burlap potato sack.


Video by Brit: Who's clearly much smarter than we are since she opted out of this one :lol:

I have to say, this is easily my new favorite Skyscraper ride. Being 150 feet in the air staring at the ocean while upside-down is a ridiculous mindf*ck and the entire thing was flipping like crazy and completely out of control. I know these things are expensive, but pony up the cash. You won’t regret it. This ride is bullsh*t in the absolute best way possible.

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Action shot.

Anyway (watch this Segway… watch it… watch), do you know what’s bullsh*t in the worst way possible? Chamber of Checkers? What’s Chamber of Checkers you ask? Only the best f*cking maze that’s ever been a maze.

Before I get into our chamber of checkers experience, I want to give you a disclaimer if you’re thinking about “check”ing (see what I did there?) it out. This maze is designed to disorient you and it’s very easy to become lost. Before you enter, make sure you use the bathroom, bring a bottle of water, grab some protein bars and write down some emergency contact numbers for the local police, fire department and coast guard in case you’re unable to find your way out. You should probably also bring straws in case you run low on supplies and need to draw them in the event that you need to start eating people. Finally, please note that without a wristband, the park charges people ACTUAL MONEY to enter the maze. I couldn’t f*cking believe it either but it’s true. Good luck to all who decide to enter and may the odds be ever in your favor.

Knowing all of this, we reluctantly entered the maze and were hoping against hope that we’d make it out in the 6 hours before park close so we didn’t miss our Great White credit while we were waiting on rescue crews to arrive. Once we entered the single shipping container that contains the entire maze (no, for real) we were greeted with a series of doors.

Since you just saw the entire shipping container, you already know that all but 2 of them are up against a wall (and like… we were pretty drunk), so this leaves you with a difficult decision between 2 doors. Do you enter through the door that leads directly to the exit (no, for real), or do you dare to enter the other door that leads to a pathway surrounded by a mesh fence that also leads directly to the exit? Be careful, your decision can be the difference between escaping the clutches of the maze in 10 seconds, or suffering through a disorienting, terrifying and seemingly eternal 25-30 seconds desperately searching for a way out.

Okay, in all seriousness… it should be illegal to charge people for this. I feel like the state needs to step in and shut this thing down. Once we completed the maze, we immediately went back in and tried to purposely f*ck up and we still got out in less than 2 minutes, finding an even easier way to get out of the maze In the process. The fact that the same people that have Ghost Ship are still operating this thing is hilarious, but more on that later.

Anyway, despite the negative review the maze did serve it’s purpose and allowed us to kill literally tens of seconds that would have otherwise been spent waiting for Great White to open. One we successfully escaped a second time, we saw the ride ops coming down the ramp to open the line and we promptly got on the first public train of the day (though it was early evening by that point).

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I'm a sharrrrrrrrrrrk, I'm a sharrrrrrrrrrrrk... (still don't Google this)

I have to admit, I wasn’t really expecting anything from Great White for the simple fact that you literally never hear anything about it but I was really impressed. It’s a smooth enough ride, the turn under the boardwalk is super cool, the view from the lift is breathtaking (at night you can see the lights from Rehoboth which was cool for us since we’re so used to being there looking at the lights of Cape May and Wildwood) but you’re quickly snapped back to reality as you realize “oh there goes gravity” as you barrel down the great first drop and lose yourself in the moment.

… are you tired of my sh*t yet? Yes? Too bad.

Anyway following the drop the ride features a ton of great laterals and occasionally surprises you with some really good pops of airtime. We ended up riding this ride quite a bit, partially because it’s the only good ride on the pier that’s included with a wristband but mostly just because it’s a damn good coaster that’s honestly really underrated.

After we got our fill of rides on Great White it was starting to get dark out and we quickly realized that night time is when Wildwood really comes alive.
We made our way back up towards the other piers, stopping in a few stores along the way to shop for souvenir’s, play some classic arcade games and so I could gorge myself on more boardwalk food.

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Fun Fact: This ride sucks at night too

Once we had ridden everything, we definitely fell into a more laid back approach to the night. We spent most of our time hanging out around Surfside and Mariner’s piers, re-riding a lot of the rides (mainly “it” and the Flume) checking out the awesome Ghost Ship (which was really impressive) and taking in the atmosphere.

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Zoomin' Phloomin' Lovin errey day.

After a few more hours of riding, eating and having an all-out awesome time, we ended the night with a few drinks and some awesome garlic clams at the rooftop bar at Surfside before heading back to Adventure Pier for a few final laps on Great White before collapsing into bed at our weird a** hotel where we were (thankfully) way too tired to worry about the weirdness.

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Awesome bar!


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... seriously

Up next... our trip back home with a few pit stops along the shore.

Spoiler alert:
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Re: Coasterbill's Alcohol, Coaster and Culture Trip Reports

Postby Nrthwnd » Wed May 17, 2017 11:18 am

^ Great continuation, BIll!

Now.... we gotta wait till May, 2018 for the last installment, right? :wink:
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Re: Coasterbill's Alcohol, Coaster and Culture Trip Reports

Postby boldikus » Wed May 17, 2017 11:30 am

coasterbill wrote:

Video by Brit: Who's clearly much smarter than we are since she opted out of this one :lol:


OMFG lmao I forgot there was video evidence! I love how you can lightly hear us cackling away.

Great update! Apologies again for the blue pics haha!

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Re: Coasterbill's Alcohol, Coaster and Culture Trip Reports

Postby ytterbiumanalyst » Wed May 17, 2017 12:32 pm

Yes! Another great trip report. My reaction while reading the maze bit:

Oh, cool, they have a maze.

Is it really big or something?

No, he's sh*tting us.

That's a lot of explanation. Surely he's sh*tting us.

Ha! Hahahhahahhahahahahahahha! :lmao:

I will have to do this maze. Don't worry, I'll have the wristband.
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Re: Coasterbill's Alcohol, Coaster and Culture Trip Reports

Postby boldikus » Wed May 17, 2017 1:00 pm

Alright so the thing with the maze. I explained this before I think in the Moreys thread. Yes it was a total joke last year. We only did it because we were killing time waiting for TGW to open and its literally right next to the entrance for TGW. Also we had wristbands so it was free. (No they should not be charging money for it!)

It used to be on Surfside Pier for years. It was huge. 2 floors. Dead ends, mirrors, other random sh*t in it. Took forever to get out of. It was fun. When they put in Atmosfear and the Guest Services building behind it they moved the maze to Adventure Pier across from TGW. It was down to one floor at that point but it was definitely more extensive than just the shipping container as you can see from these photos I just found on google (Of course I can't find any images of when it was two floors and across from Nor'easter but trust me, it existed).

fun-house-maze-on-moreysadventure.jpg

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Last year they expanded the go-kart track across from TGW and the maze was moved across the pier to next to TGW's entrance and there we have it. It did stay like that all of last year to the best of my knowledge but as I haven't been down Adventure Pier yet this year for all I know they could have (and hopefully have) expanded it.

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Re: Coasterbill's Alcohol, Coaster and Culture Trip Reports

Postby coasterbill » Wed May 17, 2017 5:09 pm

At this point I would honestly be a little sad if they ever improved it. It's achieved "So bad it's good" status and they should never ever f*ck with it. It's perfect.

Nrthwnd wrote:^ Great continuation, BIll!

Now.... we gotta wait till May, 2018 for the last installment, right? :wink:


:lol: Yes.

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Re: Coasterbill's Alcohol, Coaster and Culture Trip Reports

Postby bluestreak » Wed May 17, 2017 5:27 pm

Your Eminem references :nina: :lol:
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Re: Coasterbill's Alcohol, Coaster and Culture Trip Reports

Postby Canobie Coaster » Wed May 17, 2017 7:06 pm

Great report! I finally plan to make it down to Wildwood this summer and this report makes me look forward to it more. I'll remember to visit Mack's.
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