Photo TR: Six Flags America Shenanigans

[cfcI've gone pantless!]

Thanks for showing us Heritage Square and the flea market. Now I don't have to visit them myself.

[sreMacaroni and Donkey]

Awesome reports Laura!!!! but now we still have to fine the Big Mike cards!!!!

[cal1br3ttoWhy do I still have a donkey title???]

Any other Colorado adventures?

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Yup! Here was my itinerary:
May 19th: Elitch Gardens (page 2)
May 20th: Mile High Flea Market and Heritage Square (duh)
May 20th AGAIN!: Lakeside Amusement Park (TR coming soon)

Also, I'll be back in Denver in a couple months.

[MayTheGForceBeWithYouStar Wars is gay.]

^I see what you did there...

Anyways, excited to see more!

[A.J.Counts I305 as 32 credits...]

Romantic swan boats for you and your date. But you're a coaster enthusiast, so of course you don't have one.

Let me tell you what, I may be a lanky roller coaster enthusiast with a little too much red hair, but I most certainly have...yeah, I don't have one. Thanks for showing me how great my life is.

Did you do the Alpine Slide? They're a ton of fun.

[giscoStarbucks Enthusiast]

Nice report and I love the captions.

[cal1br3ttoWhy do I still have a donkey title???]

On Sunday, May 20, I headed to Lakeside Amusement Park to complete my run of all (erm, both) "major" Denver parks.

In case you didn't read what I JUST SAID. And hopefully PTSA doesn't stand for Post Traumatic Stress Amelioration, 'cause that won't happen here. Try "Aggravation."

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The park immediately started giving off a VERY strong Indiana Beach vibe (though, admittedly, I don't even remember if any part of Indiana Beach actually looks like this photo). Also, to help set the scene of this park, I must inform you there was a dead bird lying on the entryway.

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Besides its Midwest cousin Indiana Beach, the park shows similarities to several other traditional amusement parks. Knoebels, without the overwhelmingly lovable, tucked-in-the-woods atmosphere. Kennywood, with fewer major rides and no hint of a corporate feel. And it's closely comparable to Rye Playland, though that park might have the edge in ride selection. Anybody know how it compares to Conneaut Lake Park?

"Daaamn gurl, you lookin' FIERCE!"

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Meet the infamous Tower of Jewels (what jewels?). This stunning, um, structure, is visible throughout much of the park.

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I was surprised to see a sign this iconic in such poor shape, and partly blocked. Give me an axe and a can of pink paint, stat.

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As you can see, the park has fostered a mutually beneficial relationship with the Disney Corporation, securing the rights to use likenesses of such beloved characters as Chip 'n' Dale.

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Lakeside has the admirable policy of opening a few sucky rides first and then gradually starting to open the good ones an hour later, or something like that. But today they were nice and opened Wild Chipmunk early.

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If you enjoy moderate physical discomfort, THIS IS THE RIDE FOR YOU. My fourth and final old-school Miler Mouse (thank goodness), this seemed heavier on the lats than those at Adventure City, Texas Wonderland, and Snooki-Land.

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Let's ride the Scrambler! Because it's there.

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It was good, but not amazing. Yes, there is absolutely a such thing as an amazing Scrambler.

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Fact: if you stare at this long enough, it begins to look misspelled. Wait, on second thought, that's probably just me.

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I got a slightly short cycle and an extra-long cycle on this, because somebody made a boo-boo. Sadly, my second ride was WORSE (people were trying to get the "good" cars, and I failed very badly at this, as I thought finding a seat not covered in dirt was a slightly higher priority).

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Lakeside even has a big pretend spider to go with all their real ones! Or at least, this strikes me as the kind of place that WOULD have a lot of creepy-crawlies. It sure gave me some!

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The Spider was closed for repairs. SULK!!!

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Here is a theater-style sign that reads "CYCLONE," in case you can't read...err...can't read photographs?

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And over there is a roller coaster train with fixed position lappy-things. <3

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I about spit out my gravy when I read this (okay, it isn't funny...but I had to make a gravy joke somehow and that seemed to fit).

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As you may have noticed, the park has a massive white toothpick sculpture near the entrance. Not sure what that's all about, to be honest.

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There is an early Parker carousel (that doesn't look ANYTHING like your typical Parker machine, as you no doubt will notice) right by the main ride ticket booth. I took exactly FIFTY merry-go-round pictures, but narrowed that down to a much more appropriate number.

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Warning: this ride will deliver an a$$-kicking...TO YOUR SANITY. But it's the TPR-approved kind, so it's okay. Or is it? Am I really okay after all this? I don't know anymore.

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The most beautiful figure on the world's finest carousel. A genuine and moving masterpiece.

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I developed a crush on this hauntingly alluring young lady. I know you think I'm joking.

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I...I truly have no words. But I wouldn't be surprised if this chariot does. I'm pretty sure every night at the strike of midnight all of these...things...party it up for exactly one hour.

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Looking at these pictures makes me at least as uneasy as actually riding the thing. Which I did. Twice. I was simply unable to resist The Force...or would that be The Horce?

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I don't know what this is, but I'm pretty sure it's NOT a band organ. The music was recorded, but still infiltrated my addled mind and swirled around as part of The Horce.

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HA, HA, that says "wagon." Tee-hee!

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Cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born, you're never gonna see no...actually, at Lakeside, I don't doubt that you'd find ALL of those animals. And, excepting the unicorn, I don't mean on the carousel.

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I wasn't even drunk yet at this point and I already believed I was riding around in circles on the back of a giant purple rabbit. Thank goodness there is photographic proof that this REALLY happened.

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The park had each carousel figure write down a little about itself and its favorite activities, so we could get to know them better. Oh, and again with the TPR approval.

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I KNEW IT. The carousel is possessed by the spawn of Lucifer Himself. Yeah, I don't really get the whole "Satan is goats" thing, either, but I always assumed it's because they're pernicious little devils who eat EVERYTHING, including your soul.

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I am honestly surprised I have never read anything bad about this Terrousel. Please note: I am NOT paying for your therapy.

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QUICK, LET'S RUN TO THE OPPOSITE END OF THE PARK. Oh, and tragically, these are NOT, in any way, shape, or form, Lusse Auto Skooters.

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Ummm...(So many questions. What is that? Why the hell does he look like a Popeye character to me? And what on earth is he is wearing, a DRESS???)

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The BumperCarena Dance Floor. Which, I would hope, does NOT double as a Macarena Dance Floor.

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I adore the beautiful and artful sign on the Dragon at Lakeside Amusement Park.

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He looks pretty chipper for being unemployed long-term.

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Choo-choo tracks. And a "LAKES DIE" sign...wait, no, that just says "LAKESIDE." But somehow "LAKES DIE" seems equally fitting to me.

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This must be Lakeside's "Bad Tower."

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There was a Hurricane. Thankfully, everyone survived.

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These were sadly unsnappable, but I did manage to get some funky noises and angles during my ride.

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I still maintain that this ride has legs, though.

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Cute!

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That is a Ferris wheel. Now you know.

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It's a good old-fashioned Eli Wheel with a bonus bird's nest (that's a literal statement, not carnie slang).

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ZOOM (away from the park, as fast as you can).

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Not surprisingly, this was a really fun tower, with superb junkyard-esque views.

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Fact: every year they open up this ride (and no others) for Valentine's Day. It funds their entire operating budget for the rest of the year. Okay, I made that up.

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Just what many TPR members LOVE. Maybe this is what should be open on Valentine's Day? ;)

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This was pretty wild (and pretty pretty, too). Worse than: Rye Playland. On a level with: Dorney and Kennywood. Better than: Knoebels and stupid Hershey.

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Here is a picture of the Sensational Round-Up.

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Just kidding, but here's the real thing. Explain to me how Round-Ups defy gravity?

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I seriously mistook this for a Roll-O-Plane and was terrified to ride. Thankfully, it's just a harmless ol' Loop-O-Plane. BIG difference in ride experience.

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Another example of the thriving Disney partnership.

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Matterhorns are typically charming as all get-out, and this was only a partial exception. The cycle was decent, but not excellent (common Lakeside theme).

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It was, however, DISGUSTING. Believe me, I spared you the worst. This photo looks sparkling and spotless in comparison (well, partly because there ARE sparkles, but whatever).

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Here you can catch a glimpse of the affluent neighbors who use their clout to shut down any and all expansion proposals.

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This charming dining space showed off a bit of the park's history.

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During last century's clean-up and maintenance day (next one TBA), the park uncovered all this junk and put it on display. How thoughtful.

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Yes...I imagine that playing with your "wacky duck" here would get you a ticket.

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I got lost in the mirror maze and had to follow little kids, who came in long after me, in order to get out. But more importantly, A RANDOM CREEPY MAN ASKED TO GO IN HERE WITH ME. That's Lakeside for you.

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These will get you wet. At least, if you're into that sort of bumping, they will.

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Yes, prepare for unacceptable amounts of wetness here.

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"They say it takes two to tango. If that's the case, then would you like to be my tango partner?" --actual Lakeside resident.

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I think they got jealous of Deja Vu at Six Flags and had to get their own version.

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It's just like at Grandma's house!

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Obligatory picture of the lake you are on the side of. And a lighthouse. Note the picturesque mountain background.

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Unsurprisingly, the boats here are powered by speed.

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Because we all know cars can climb stairs.

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Mini Go-Karts, anyone? Yeah, me neither.

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Lakeside is a very accepting place and won't judge you if you're interested in doing both. AS LONG AS THEY CAN WATCH.

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I know many of you are quite proficient at operating your own controls, so this should be no trouble for you.

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Sadly, this ride is not allowed on the New Texas Giant.

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I got myself stuck upside down on this TWICE. Completely intentional, and completely terrifying. When will I ever learn?

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Also, I got my car stuck in continuous-slow-flip-mode. Not my worst ride ever (a flip is still a flip), but very annoying.

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A fire happened at an undisclosed location near the park.

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The infamous "REDIT" sign (I prefer MetaFilter). If you studied Latin, you already know what this means. And before you say "YOUR MOM studied Latin," well, my mom minored in Latin. So there. And goodbye.

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[Dragon KhanWhen I grow up, I want to breed donkeys!]

I love those photo TR's of parks off the beaten track. They might NOT be home to the newest thrill machines, but are often filled with a (sometimes smelly) atmosphere, and when the pics are great and the report funny, not self based and most of all BALANCED, one can just find them amazing...

[beatle11I prefer to mate with donkeys over humans!]

The park looks to need some paint, badly. But they are much better off than Conneaut, so it seems. Nice pics Laura.

[Philrad71Don't put that donkey on the floor!]

Awesome report...this park would need to shut down for a couple of mile high seasons & have an arsonsist set it on fire a couple of times for it to look as cool as Conneaut Lake. Maybe even a Pepsi project or two?

I do LOVE the old school ride signs and would love to visit this park someday, especially at night. I remember going by it when I was a kid and always begging Mom and Dad to stop (we never did). Maybe I'll get there someday...


PS: Do they sell beer and if they do, is it not Coors?

PSS: Love that they still have the Star Ride still sitting there idle as that is without a doubt the coolest SBNO ride in the world & probably holds some type of record. I remember seeing it in a Lakeside brochure when I was a kid and wondering how you would ever ride such a thing with no cars? I thought maybe they whirled you around on the cables somehow!