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Erik & Smisty's Florida Oddventures


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Since everybody likes Smisty so much better than me all of a sudden, I'm replacing her with Bryan until you all apologize.

 

Erik & Bryan's Titanic Adventures!

Because we're both fat, you see.

 

And also, because we went here:

 

Titanic The Experience

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In the early days of our courtship, Bryan and I were looking for something romantic and indoors to do, possibly involving a large number of people dying. So where else could we go??

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This is the best part of the exhibit, because at this point you still have your illusions.

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I am Mr. Eugene Daily, 3rd Class Passenger. I enjoy dancing a jig, and being locked in the steerage sections of sinking cruise ships.

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Bryan paid extra (I made that up) to be a fancy-pants Second Class Passenger, a one Mr. Joseph Laroche. But they fooled him, because they made him a black guy. Ha ha, Bryan, you're dead!

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"You gentlemen know that you're grown adults, right?"

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He then quizzed us on how much we'd been paying attention by making us guess which way the boat in the painting was sailing...?!

 

Somehow, we passed.

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So we got to see this junk.

 

I'm sorry, I shouldn't call it junk.

 

What's an old-timey word for junk?

 

Like, crapola?

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We kept telling them that we needed separate bedrooms, but they didn't believe us!

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I don't think there were that many exit signs on the real Titanic. (Or maybe that was the problem...?!)

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Ah, there's nothing I enjoy more than looking at stairs that I'm not allowed to climb!

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This ghostly voice was recovered from the wreckage of the Titanic. It now haunts Titanic The Experience here in Orlando.

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Oh my god, it's Edith! And she's going to crash us!

 

I'm just kidding. This place sucks.

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Hey, I lived! Sweet!

 

Let's check in on the black dude....

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Oh, I'm sorry, Bryan. Better luck next time.

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I don't think I've ever seen a model of a destroyed thing before. Neat...?

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Bryan, no! We'll get kicked out!

 

Um...on second thought, touch away.

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The gift shop is a little sparse.

 

I'm not just being my usual witty self, by the way. That's pretty much the look of the whole "gift shop."

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Okay, but seriously, can *you* tell which way this ship is sailing? It's devilishly clever! If you think you know the answer, write it down on a clean sheet of 4x6.2 inch paper, fold it in half lengthwise, and then throw it in the trash.

 

Damn, Misty is smart.

Edited by Electerik
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I am fascinated/haunted by the Titanic. I guess it's kind of a morbid fascination, but I love reading all about it. I've done extensive research (for no reason whatsoever) on it. Danny and I saw a traveling version of this in Birmingham years ago. I was enthralled.

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I like exactly 1/2 of this

 

That's too much.

 

Also, I should probably mention that cameras are not permitted, but it's okay to take pictures with your cell phone.

 

That can't be right. Maybe it's just that there's no flash photography. I've blocked a lot of this out, but I'm pretty sure it's the first one.

 

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How much money am I saving by not visiting?

 

I believe it was around $20 per person. And I'm pretty sure we paid full price, or close to it.

 

I blame Bryan.

 

Well I don't blame Misty for leaving you; spending money so foolishly. But thanks for making me laugh.

Edited by larrygator
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^ It's perfectly simple: Stavros, the Greek fisherman, finds a magical seahorse (Hermes) which leads him to Atlantis. He encounters shadiness and duplicity there, but tourists are already on the way to check the place out and nobody listens to him. He tasks Hermes with guiding the tourists through Atlantis and keeping them safe--for the Atlanteans are indeed not as friendly as they first appear. Hermes goads them into revealing their true nature by start a water fight with Allura (the Siren), who then transforms into Scrylla (the Gorgon/Medusa thing). She hurls water blasts at you, which shake Atlantis and expel you! But she's not done yet. She draws you back into Atlantis and is about to consume you among the wrecked ships, when Hermes flies in and dispels her, allowing you to escape along the path she was blocking.

 

Duh.

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  • 3 weeks later...
We went to Clearwater with the intent of visiting the Clearwater Marine Aquarium and Gondolier Pizza (a restaurant we had liked a lot up in Sevierville). Driving in, we encountered heavy traffic, fought our way through it, discovered that the police were blocking lanes randomly with no explanation and "directing" traffic, often in opposition to perfectly operational traffic lights. At first we just thought there was an accident or something and that we'd get through it. But after many miles of this insanity, we discovered that there was an Iron Man triathlon-type race occurring on the streets. Of course, by this time, we were stuck in traffic that simply did not move, with no warning going in, and no way to get out of it. Gondolier turned out to be impossible to reach by car, street parking was $1.25 per hour (and we'd neglected to bring a roll of quarters), so walking was out. And the aquarium turned out to be closed the entire day because they were filming a movie there. So we left as quickly as we could (which was not very fast), only to hit construction once we were out of the triathlon zone. And by construction, I mean two perfectly good lanes of a four lane bridge were closed off with no actual construction happening. So, we then spent an hour...driving across a bridge.

 

I guess I could have researched more. But, then again, the city could have warned cars coming in of what was ahead of them. (Same with the bridge. No warning until you were on it. And nowhere else to go at that point, because it's a bridge.)

 

Whatever. My fault or theirs, I'm not going back any time soon. Clearwater can die in a fire.

 

I know, nothing like replying to a year old post. But, I have to second the Gondolier Pizza. I neglected to follow this warning and was in Clearwater in October,

 

Gondolier Pizza = awesome, AND there is a mini golf place about a quarter mile up the street. Captain Bligh's or something like that. I actually though of Erik and Smisty while playing it. Captain Bligh's definitely has seen better days. The game room could be right up there in the hunt for "Worst Game Room in the World" though having 75% of the machines including the only pinball machine out of order affected my opinion. Actually the course itself wasn't in too bad a shape, it was just the general feel of the property. Lots of gratuitous stairs and walking. Like the two or three flights of stairs AFTER the 18th hole just to get up to the office which is at the very top of the treehouse like thing to return the putter. Then to have to walk those two or three flights of stairs back down, that is after you exit through said sad sack game room.

 

Did the Clearwater Marine Aquairum. They were experiencing capacity problems due to the Dolphin Tale movie. The CMA is not all that in itself, but it does have Winter which is kind of cool, and lots of friendly good hearted volunteers working the place. They jacked the admission from $9 to $15. I actually liked the upcharge boat ride to see marine life better than the actual aquarium.

 

Problem with Clearwater is also that it is just so far from everything else.

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I am fascinated/haunted by the Titanic. I guess it's kind of a morbid fascination, but I love reading all about it. I've done extensive research (for no reason whatsoever) on it. Danny and I saw a traveling version of this in Birmingham years ago. I was enthralled.

 

I feel the same way. I saw a traveling exhibit as well when it was in Baltimore - complete with a giant iceberg!

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Nice! I went to the Titanic Experience in Pigeon Forge, looks like the exhibits share very similar qualities. I've always passed the one here in Orlando but could never bring my self to pay for it. Nice update, and it is a really good museum. My passenger died, along with all the family...we were 3rd class.

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