Another Cedar Point trip report...guhhhh.

Ew boy...here's another CP trip report - if ya don't like it, head on over to the Dollywood thread and drizzle/dab your tears about Lightning Rod .

 

Seriously, this is a PG13 trip report that this 44 year old would have classified as Rated R back in 1984...

 

WARNING!!!!

 

There is talk of alcohol & alcoholism, intoxication, food porn, politically-correct swear words, gay & lesbian stuff, possible sexual innuendos, dimwitted observations about life in general...and I don't know what else because I'm already drunk tonight so we're just gonna play it by ear.

 

I take requests, so if you want Valravn pics, sunset pics, Battery Park/Marblehead pics, food pics, FunPix ridiculousness or just a blurred & drunken photo, post a comment to let me know what you want to see and I will try to hook you up.

 

 

BEWARE - YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!!

 

 

Now let's skip on over to Frontier Town after entering the back door of Cedar Point (quit acting like that is a bad thing)...

 

Went to Cedar Point last weekend to check out the last weekend of the Brew & BBQ event. As many of you know, this is CP's 2nd season for hosting this event, although this year they switched things up and had it on the Frontier Trail near Maverick and Mean Streak.

 

While I didn't attend last year's event at the Lake Shore Pavilion, I feel that this is a great location to host the event. If you are a pass-holder (season or platinum) you get an hour early entry to the event which normally runs from 5-park close. (Fun Tip: This means that you get to get loaded earlier and then go enjoy shorter ride waits while the peasants have to wait in long food & beer lines!)

 

The food - not a huge selection, but your typical ribs & brisket type of stuff. Not overwhelmingly awesome, but not horrible either.

 

The beer - this is why you come if you are a beer enthusiast. The event boasted over 160 micro and craft beers - many from the general area. When you buy your tickets, they throw in 4 oz. sample glasses as well as a coupon to try a full 12 oz cup of Valravn beer.

 

Overall takeaway - I love this type of stuff, I really do...so I can't say that it wasn't awesome. My only wish would be that they increase the food offerings as they had about as many kiosks as the Spring Bloom festival (four) at Kings Dominion and the choices were fairly slim. But when you have over 160 beers to sample, who cares about eating anyway?

 

 

 

 

 

 

Did I mention that there were over 160 craft beers?

Instead of sucking in gas fumes & go-kart exhaust while entering the park from the back entrance, you now have healthy looking greenery around Magnum - but for how long?

 

I still believe that Soak City is going to invade the "artist formerly known as Challenge Park" (RIP Prince) in the not too distant future.

 

I just wish that I wasn't such a pussy and rode Skyscraper when I had the chance. Oh well, maybe I can ride it when it opens next year as a new ride at Valleyfair, Michigan's Adventure, Worlds Of Fun...or some other park that Cedar Fair doesn't really care about .

We are here, we are queer and we like delicious food & beer!

 

Okay, I admit that I like to make up vapid & immature chants that suit my own personal agenda.

Kinda hard to see, but the tent on the left is representing my hometown beer - Southern Tier.

 

Should I have pumped my fist in the air and hollered: "Southern Tier represent!"? Probably not, because I am just way too shy + I don't disrespect people's right to eat and drink in peace without a drunk, obnoxious clown loudly proclaiming a statement that no one else really cares about.

 

But for those of you that DO care?

 

Well, let me just say this...

 

Southern Tier is a very good craft beer that resides a mere four miles from our residence. Please go and buy Southern Tier beer at your local market or fine distributor because their mission is "to provide their customers with consistently fresh, clean, American craft ales and lagers that stand on their own merit" (end local beer manufacturing shameless plug).

 

I also noticed that people here were very happy. Not 'Disney Be Our Guest' type of happy, but more of a 'I Freaking Love Cedar Point Especially When I Can Drink Kick-Ass Beer & then ride rides' kind of happy.**

 

No folks out of control, which was refreshing to see. Although we were there early...it could have gotten crazy after the last show of the night at Lusty Lil's.

This was a pulled pork sandwich - basically a BBQ pulled pork slider with hot-ass jalapenos on it. Washed it down with a Long Trail Green Blaze IPA - both decent.

Michael got the sausage platter with what looks like a mish-mash of potato salad & coleslaw.

 

The sausages were decent, but I didn't touch the potatosaladslaw because I freaking hate coleslaw. Whoever came up with the idea to mix cabbage and mayo should be shot. No wait...in light of the recent horrific tragedies in Orlando, fuck that saying. I'm going to now go with the originator of coleslaw should be banished to not only ride Son Of Beast forever in Hades while a laser snake makes you ride a horse on fire, but to also ride Hades 360 bareback. There...that's much better sounding, isn't it?

 

Caveat: Please don't take offense of this caption. I am just trying to bring a smile and some fun in light of the recent awful, horrific tragedies that happened over the weekend in Orlando. And if you do take offense? I'm not gonna get offended either...because do you know why???

 

Because I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me.

This is the bluegrass band that plays such bluegrass smash hits like 'I Wanna Rock & Roll All Night' and 'Mmmmmbop'.

 

I admit to stomping my feet and hollering a couple of "Yeeeee-Hawwws" during their set - pure fun in its rawest form.

Great Lakes Brewery out of Cleveland had plenty of offerings. This is one that I had never tried - Chillwave Double IPA. I think you can probably tell that I like IPA by now?

Here is the cute little beer sample mug along with a full cup of complimentary Valravn beer that they give you with your $20 ticket purchase ($30 for non pass-holders). Valravn is labeled as a Session IPA, which for you in-training junior alcoholics means that you just need to sit down for a while and focus on nothing but drinking copious amounts of this type of alcohol.

The brisket was probably the best option out of the bunch. Fall apart, melt in your mouth goodness!

BBQ nachos - also not too shabby. But at this point, I was really starting to get uncomfortable from all of the food and beer.

 

Time to go shake it all up by riding a few rides and coasters, I suppose?

Wait...we might as well get one for the road. A good "dessert" beer - Redhead Ciderhouse's Smooth Hoperator.

 

I bet Jebus is really gonna have at us when we get to Gloryland for all of this horrible gluttony.

From our drinking table we could watch Maverick break down every ten minutes.

Hey look....there are people excited to be on Mean Streak - is that you, coasterbill???

 

 

Next up: More America's Rockin' Roller Coast - Ride On.

 

If you want to get your hankies out for some hot Valravn shots, copious amount of sunset park photos, unfamiliar angles of the park (that only TPR folks have seen before) post your comments!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**: This opinion does not necessarily reflect the opinions of Philrad71 - but it's entirely a 99.9% probability.

Edited August 7, 2016 by Philrad71

From our drinking table we could watch Maverick break down every ten minutes.

 

 

Good one. And the whole BBQ-Brew thing looks great!

Not much for jalpenos on anything, though. If they are very 'hot' ones.

 

I have a delicate palate.

Edited June 16, 2016 by Nrthwnd

The People of Walmart pics please.

Beer, Bar B Q, yummy hot jalepenos, with a side of coasters. What's not to love?

The Chillwave is fantastic. Glad you got to try it! I also just realized the Brew Kettle makes CP's featured beers. Their IPA, White Rajah, won an award recently. Good to know they're not just taking some bum "It's craft beer but really if you look close it's under Coors/Busch" label beer.

Great report so far, can't wait to see more! Was this the event they had over in the pavilion by Windseeker last year? This sounds like a much better setup. Personally I think SeaWorld's "Bands, Brews and BBQ" is the best thing ever so the more events like this, the better.

 

I take requests, so if you want Skyride pics

 

^ Yeah same thing. We checked it out last year @ the pavillion and all left stuffed with a good buzz... and rode Windseeker. I like that its right next to Maverick.

 

Also, great report so far! I knew I was gonna enjoy it when I got to this:

 

and I don't know what else because I'm already drunk tonight so we're just gonna play it by ear.

This is awesome!! Thanks for posting, and t looks like a good time was being had by all!

 

 

LOL @

"Because I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me. "

Thanks for the comments guys!

 

I admit that I am a little more sober this time around, so perhaps my comments might not quite be as entertaining this eve. But....just to be on the safe side, I'll grab a Manhattan and make a go of Round #2 and see where it leads.

 

And now that we are well buzzed and stuffed to the gills from BBQ stuff, why not go ride some stuff?

And stuff don't get no better than this. Is that airtime hill not one of the best out there??

 

And the new I-305-like restraints were sheer bliss so now you can throw your hands up in the air and wave them like you just don't care versus getting Glass Joe'd upside the head with the old ones. Win.

Here's a shot never seen before on TPR - the top of the train station and one of those beauteous sweeping turns on Mean Streak. Not sure what I was aiming to accomplish with this one, but you know...drinking.

Wasted away again in....Boneville?

 

I thought Boneville would have been closer to Big Bone Lick State Park...you know, the state park that's right down the road from that new Jebus-themed park in Kentucky?

 

The more you know...

Is dirtybill a relative of THE original coasterbill? Inquiring minds want to know!

I am pretty sure that I saw the guy in red walking around P-Town a couple of summers ago.

 

Wait, is that a Glory Hole he's standing at? Yep, that's definitely him!

Who votes 'yea' to bring back Paddlewheel Excursions after the epic fail that was - Shoot Teh Rapids?

 

ME, ME!!!!

Speaking of STR, it's now just an empty shell of it's former self. They might as well have labeled the building Crystal Pepsi Bottling Co for as long as it lasted.

 

But fear not friends! CP will not let this area go to waste in 2016....it's now....wait for it.....a smoking area!!!

 

So instead of families flipping upside down in logs for talking politics, happy guests can now use this area to sear their lungs with hot tar & nicotine! And smokers, please don't take offense as I used to do it for many years. And you know what? I freaking loved it at the time...before it killed my mother.

Aaaaaaarrrggghhhh!!! The Red Garter is on fire...save the beer, save the beer!!!!

A twisted mess of steel for a twisted mess of a coaster.

 

Tarzan say: Floorless better than stand...but ride still no good.

Anyone ever start a conversation with: "I once rode a loop THIS big!" before?

Any time that I see the line for MF this short, I pray to God and give him a big Thankee.

See?

 

Fun fact #2: I don't really believe in God - SURPRISE!!!!

 

More coming soon...

Edited June 16, 2016 by Philrad71

Yes, Yes, that's the guy. He's still in P-Town. Too funny. Loving this report.

^ Ahhh...you know that guy that wears the ass-chaps with no undies in P-Town???

 

I'm going to fancy a guess that you saw him upstairs at the A-House too???

^ Believe me...the first time I walked upstairs at the A-House, I felt afraid....very, very afraid!

Happy Saturday everyone!

 

Just wanted to throw in a quick Saturday update to keep things going...still lots of photos to be posted later!

The next two updates are going to get really hot and heavy with the sunset pics

Some new sexiness off in the distance

Bill, get your hankie out now

Sexy Scrambler with the Seeker of Wind in the background.

 

You ever wonder if Windseeker was named and designed that way so that when it closes down every time someone farts into the wind, it can just sit around and do nothing...sorta similar to a lot of American's work ethic?

When was the last time this bad boy showed up in a CP trip report?

I had planned on keeping my spine intact on this trip, so we skipped Corkscrew this time around.

 

Still adds that special ambience to the midway though...so hope they keep it around for a while longer.

Edited June 19, 2016 by Philrad71

Phil - great report as usual

Great photos. Especially of Sky Ride. Lol

Sky Ride is great. Between that and the train I saved like 10 miles of walking lol

Thanks for the comments, guys...and a Happy Father's Day to all of the coaster enthusiast Dad's out there!

 

Yes, I admit that the SkyRide and train can be lifesavers toward the end of the day. Although I sure wish that the one that went from the Corkscrew area to Frontier Town was still there!

 

Edit - Despite the fact that I asked a ride op before I took the Skyride photos posted earlier, I checked the CP website and it said that photography was strictly prohibited on all rides but the train. Out of respect for the park, I have pulled all of my Skyride photos.

 

Sorry about that folks!

Edited June 19, 2016 by Philrad71

I love Gatekeeper but we never ride anywhere but the front seat. I agree on the metal bar so my personal favorite seat is the front outside seat on the left wing (station closest to the midway). Left wing is the best wing... remember that (are we still talking about coasters?)

 

Oh and I'm glad someone else appreciates the Cedar Point Sky Ride as much as I do.

Raptor is amazing. Before this week I hadn't been on any inverts except Batman clones and I really wasn't a fan of the heavy sustained g-forces. Banshee was a little better but the new B&M vest restraints ruined that for me. I ended up being really apprehensive about Raptor because of that, but it's easily my favorite invert. I rode in the front every time and the g-forces are never too intense. I expected a double-length Batman clone and Raptor is waaay better than a Batman clone. Sustained g-forces were never prominent, it's way smoother than any other invert I've been on, and the whip in the inversions is amazing. Just keep your head forward if you can (even though the whip didn't smack my head at all either way).

Raptor is definitely my favorite B&M looper.

^^ I was actually all set to take the outside seat (front right), but another single rider got in right behind me so I was a good doobie and just took the inside seat despite having the choice of the two seats. Never again!

 

^ Yes, Raptor is a great coaster, but you do need to ride it in a somewhat defensive position with it ripping through the course like this. Please note that when I say defensive, I am not talking about Mean Streak or Mantis type of "ride defensively or get your ass totally kicked" type of riding...you just need to prep yourself for that snappy transition into the final brake run more than anything else.

Edited June 19, 2016 by Philrad71

I never had to ride defensively on Raptor, though my normal riding position is usually leaning into the turns and slightly forward, and I'm 6' and lanky so that probably had an effect on it as well.

^ Me too, but I let my guard down for only that final snap into the brake run and took a pretty good whap because of it.

Riding Raptor with your head slightly forward is pretty good advice. I always do that instinctively. There's nothing you can to to prevent the snap so the best advice for that is to stop being a b**ch and embrace it.

^ That's exactly what I do when I ride...and yeah, I accepted my bitch-ness as I was still cracking up coming off the ride. I was thinking to myself "holy balls, that ride was freaking crazy fast & forceful tonight!"